NFL 2018 Week 9 Recap

Smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol in hot tubs has long been a passion of mine. It takes a special equilibrium to not get the cigarette wet and/or get filthy hot tub water in your Jack and Coke. Now I’m aware that some of you may take objection to the word “filthy” in the previous sentence because you’ve been arguing your entire lives that, “there is a ton of chlorine in the water…it’s fine…it kills everything…you’re being paranoid…“, but this in fact, is not the case at all.

Hot tubs are literally crawling with bacteria – bacteria that can make you extremely sick. This is pure science, yet there are many who refuse to believe it and I would get very tired of arguing this with you people every freakin’ time I used to cheap-out at the ski lodge and get a chalet with a shared tub. This is why I originally decided to join the money-making Sports Information Network and start earning. The kind of gains that allow you to not even question whether or not to get a private tub at the resort. It’s a given you’ll be booking the best.

Don’t believe the water’s foul? Go check out what journalists over at Fox News say about hot tubs, however, I’m sure that you bread-making liberals out there will probably still deny the truth. It seems the sheeple of the world are happier following fake news media and staying ignorant than learning facts. Thanks, Obama.

So why am I taking the time to ramble on about my pet peeves at 5 Star resorts instead of trying to sell you NFL picks? Well, why would I bother? We’ve been consistently winning for a year and a half, and we still only have 1,152 Twitter followers (and falling), and no one besides this website ever mentions us. We’ve been waiting to be contacted by one of the “industry experts” at ESPN, CBS, MSNBC, or any other mainstream media companies who have now decided to dive in and fight for a piece of the offshore pie, but alas, nothing. Our yacht phone has not rang…why ever could this be?!

Well, there’s only one answer: no one’s interested in how to bet on football and they just want to be a useless cog in the machine, exposing old takes, re-posting stale, sad frog memes, and piling on when touts have a bad week. All talk, no action, and zero bankroll. I get it, though – it is fun to argue with Twidiots on the official SIN Twitter account sometimes. It’s just not lucrative.

You see, around the SIN offices (located on yachts offshore) we like being profitable. We like earning stacks a lot. We like it so much that we actually launched this website to try to help promote the Lobster Life and let you all in on the winning lifestyle that tons of pro gamblers around the world are enjoying today. Many have decided to set sail with us, but sadly there are still too many out there who watch from the sidelines. Oh well, to each their own.

So how did it go for 2018 NFL Week 9? I forget. Oh, wait, no…actually, we won 73% of our props and 29% of game line plays. There’s really nothing to see here…only excellence. Thank you, come again.

Yes this percentage is unbelievable, yes we were very surprised too, and NO, we’re probably not going to replicate it again this year. Or are we?

The following is what SIN Member X got down on this week – as always, feel free to send us your plays and we’ll happily add them into the record. Our love of loot is only surpassed by our love of transparency…

Game Lines: 2-5 (29%)

Props: 45-17-1 (73%)

TNF

San Francisco 49’ers -2.5 W
Jordy Nelson over 3.5 receptions L
Doug Martin under 60.5 rushing yards W
George Kittle under 5 receptions W
Marquise Goodwin over 46.5 receiving yards L
Marquise Goodwin over 3 receptions L
Jordy Nelson over 44.5 receiving yards L

Sunday

Detroit Lions +5 L
Baltimore Ravens -1 L
Tampa Bay Buccanneers +6 L
Denver Broncos -1 L
Rams/Saints under 57.5 L
Joe Flacco under 270.5 passing yards W
Willie Snead under 45.5 receiving yards L
Peyton Barber under 50.5 rushing yards W
Cam Newton under 45.5 rushing yards W
Greg Olsen under 50.5 receiving yards L
Julio Jones under 7.5 receptions W
Tevin Coleman over 17.5 receiving yards W
Tevin Coleman over 42.5 rushing yards W
Alex Smith over 13.5 rushing yards W
Ryan Fitzpatrick under 315.5 passing yards W
Desean Jackson under 65.5 receiving yards W
Jordan Reed under 52.5 receiving yards W
Nathan Peterman over 156.5 passing yards W
Charles Clay over 2.5 receptions L
Kelvin Bejamin over 2.5 receptions W
LeSean McCoy over 43.5 rushing yards L
Taylor Gabriel under 4.5 receptions W
Jordan Howard under 68.5 rushing yards W
Greg Olsen over 3.5 receptions W
Devin Funchess under 62.5 receiving yards W
Devin Funchess under 4.5 receptions W
Christan McCaffrey under 6.5 receptions W
DeSean Jackson under 4.5 receptions W
Willie Snead under 4 receptions L
JuJu Smith-Schuster under 5.5 receptions W
Kareem Hunt under 83.5 rushing yards L
Kyle Rudolph under 4.5 receptions W
Adam Thielen under 107.5 receiving yards W
Adam Thielen under 8.5 receptions W
Robert Woods under 86.5 receiving yards W
DeAndre Hopkins under 7.5 receptions L
Deshaun Watson over 22.5 rushing yards W
Demaryius Thomas over 44.5 receiving yards W
Melvin Gordon under 66.5 rushing yards L
Russell Wilson over 230.5 passing yards W
Jared Goff under 320.5 passing yards L
Todd Gurley under 49.5 receiving yards W
Drew Brees under 313.5 passing yards L
Mark Ingram under 51.5 rushing yards W
Alvin Kamara over 47.5 rushing yards W
Aaron Rodgers under 319.5 passing yards W
Julian Edelman under 6.5 receptions W
Jimmy Graham over 4 receptions P
Randall Cobb over 4 receptions W
James White under 85.5 rsh+rcv yards L
Josh Gordon under 4.5 receptions L
Doug Baldwin over 52.5 receiving yards W
Tom Brady under 323.5 passing yards W
Julian Edelman under 80.5 receiving yards W

MMF
Tennessee Titans +5 W
Marcus Mariota over 19 completions W
Tajae Sharpe under 3 receptions W
Ezekiel Elliott over 25.5 receiving yards W
Cole Beasley under 45.5 receiving yards W
Dak Prescott under 33.5 rushing yards W
Marcus Mariota under 29.5 rushing yards L
Marcus Mariota over 204.5 passing yards W
Amari Cooper under receiving yards 61.5 W

Current Record for 2018 NFL Season

Game Lines: 34-35-1 (49.3%)

Props: 254-183-7 (58.1%)

 

Yes – I really wish that I would have done this recap on the following Tuesday rather than 2 weeks later – it would have been a lot sweeter to rub the experts’ faces in it, but what can you do? It’s honestly just not that exciting any more. Trump was right: we’re all tired of winning. Too. Much. Winning. Think about that – 73% successful plays and not only do we not care, the world doesn’t care either.

Isn’t a 73% victory percentage for the week (and 58% after 9 weeks) cause for some type of reaction on the internet? Isn’t the entire USA now engulfed in Sports Gambling Fever and craving content? Well here’s some content for you – we’re pulling miracles out of Jacques Tannenbaum’s derrière and there’s not so much as a Tweet from a happy SIN member. You really can’t make this stuff up.

So please enjoy reading all the garbage articles from experts who definitely live Las Vegas and know what they’re talking about and we and our members will just sit quietly over here making money. Every. Single. Week.

ANNOUNCEMENT: We are now giving away free Rest of Season Packages to anyone who will write about the SIN story and publish it on their blog, website, or “insider” service. Hell, at this point I’d even consider giving one away to someone who wrote a nicely-worded Tweet about us. Meh…maybe not…fortune has almost killed half of us in The Network, no telling what fame would do…